What a terrible predicament.

You've clearly got a good case.

Let's say it's a medical malpractice case against your doctor.

You believe he was careless.

You believe his carelessness was a cause of your injury.

You believe your injury is permanent.

Your doctor disagrees.

He says he did nothing wrong.

He says your injury is not from anything he did or didn't do.

Besides, he says your injury is not as bad as you claim.

It's true that you're miserable.

It's true that you're unhappy.

It's true that you've been looking to blame someone for your physical injury.

You never accepted the explanation that your injury was a risk of the procedure.

You never accepted the fact that your doctor told you this could happen.

You felt it happened because he was careless.

You're bitter.

Bitter because now your life is on hold.

Bitter because you can't do all your daily activities.

Bitter because your life now revolves around your doctor appointments.

You're angry too.

Angry that you have not been able to return to work.

Angry that your earnings have been drastically affected.

Angry that you needed to go on disability.

You now feel as if you're asking for a handout.

That was never you.

You always worked for your wages.

You always provided for your family.

You always did what was right.

Except now you can't.

You're sarcastic now.

You're angry now.

You're bitter.

You look out your window and see people walking by without a care in the world.

You see men and women walking their dogs, with their only concern is picking up dog poop.

You want to be as carefree as they do.

You want to go back in time to when you were not disabled.

But you just can't get over it.

These feelings permeate everything you do.

You've distanced yourself from your spouse.

Your kids can't stand to be in the same room as you.

You are intolerable.

You get into arguments with every service provider.

The cable guy.

The plumber.

Even the mailman is afraid to interact with you.

You yell.

You scream.

You're like a crazy old man.

People who interact with you think you're a crazy old man.

You weren't always like this.

This only happened after your medical treatment.

After the complications.

You realized soon after that you needed an attorney.

You need legal help.

You found an attorney online.

He looked good.

He had experience.

From the moment you met him, you were confrontational.

You were demanding.

You wanted justice.

You wanted your doctor to pay.

Pay with his reputation.

Pay with his checkbook.

Pay with the knowledge that he ruined your life.

Your lawyer was hesitant to take you on as a client.

He thought you had a good case.

But he had to make sure.

He needed his medical expert to confirm you had a valid case.

He did a thorough investigation.

He obtained all your medical records.

He had his board certified expert review them.

His expert confirmed that your doctor was careless.

His expert confirmed that your doctors' wrongdoing was a cause of your injury.

He also confirmed that your injury is significant and permanent.

Unbeknownst to you, your attorney almost didn't take your case.

He didn't tell you this, but he thought you were out of control.

He knew immediately that you were a problem client.

He knew right away that you'd be trouble if your case got to trial.

He knew that even if you had a good case, you'd make his life miserable.

He debated whether he should take your case.

He debated whether it was worthwhile to put up with the aggravation.

He asked himself whether earning a substantial legal fee was worth it in light of having to deal with you on a regular basis.

He bit the bullet and decided to go for it.

You simply assumed that since you had a valid case, any lawyer would eagerly take your case.

You were partially right.

Your lawyer was right.

You are a difficult client.

You are a miserable client.

You're constantly in pain.

You're a pain in the neck.

You continually harass your lawyer wondering why your lawsuit doesn't move faster.

You think your lawyer is asleep on the job if you don't hear back from him every few days.

You berate him wondering why the defense isn't immediately trying to settle your 'excellent' case.

You are continually emailing your attorney to tell him about every ache and pain when you get up from your chair.

You believe the more you email him, the more information he'll send to the defense, the more they'll realize you have a good case.

Your attorney has silently labeled you a problem client.

A client who is overbearing.

A client who is on the verge of being intolerable.

He tries to be patient with you.

He tries to explain what you need to know.

He does his best to keep his tongue in check.

He knows you can get up and go to another attorney at any time.

He's invested heavily in your case.

He's invested his precious time.

He's invested his precious money.

He's given up his values to sit in a room with you while you yell at him and he quietly listens and nods.

But he's got a bigger problem.


You are the problem.

You are also the solution.

He knows that in the long run, your case is going to trial.

He knows from experience that jurors decide cases based on who they like.

He knows the jury will NOT like you.

Not one bit.

They just won't.

At least not in your present configuration.

Your lawyer knows that when you meet the defense lawyer at your question and answer session known as a deposition, he will not like you either.

Your attorney knows that the defense lawyer will report back to the insurance company that you are insufferable.

That you are intolerable.

That you are nasty.

That you are obnoxious.

He knows that the defense lawyer will love this.

This will make him giddy with joy.

The insurance company will be jumping for joy.

They won't believe their great luck.

He knows that on the medicine, they're screwed.

He knows that the defense will see exactly what his expert sees.

That your doctor screwed up.

That your doctor caused you harm.

That your harm is signficant.

He knows that's exactly what they'll see.

But they won't want to settle your case.

Why not?

Because they know a jury will hate you.

Yes, hate you.

That's harsh.

It's not that they won't like you.

It's worse.

It's that they will HATE you.

They'll feel sorry for you.

But they'll still HATE you nonetheless.

You don't understand that.

You're not in tune with that vibe.

That's the problem.

You see, the world revolves around you.

At least that's how you perceive it.

Since not everyone is paying attention to your problems, you get angry.

It's not all your fault.

Your attorney understands that.

He understands that your pain is real.

He understands that your pain impairs your outlook.

He realizes that what you are going through is real.

He also understands the reality of a trial.

He recognizes that jurors look at litigants to see who they are and what their mindset is.

Are you likeable?

Are you relatable?

Are you kind?

Are you friendly?

What's your outlook?

Before you ever get to trial, your attorney has work to do.

Not legal work.

I'm talking about working on YOU.

Working on your mindset.

Working on your outlook.

Working on making you presentable.

On toning down your edginess.

Working on removing the sarcasm.

Working on making you 'softer'.

Not changing you.

Not changing who you are.

Not changing your physical condition.

But working on YOU.

You need to be more likeable.

If you're not, the jury won't care about the merits of your case.

You'll just make it that much harder for them to give you a verdict in your favor if you're nasty and obnoxious.

You can be the biggest son of a bitch on the planet.

But if that personality shows during your pretrial deposition and during your trial, it won't matter much that your experts confirm you have a good case.

Of course I could be wrong.

The jury could ignore your personality and focus on the merits.

That could happen.

But then again, most likely, it won't.

If you give jury a reason to hate you, they will.

That will make it very challenging to convince them that you are more likely right than wrong.

That will make it very difficult to get a verdict in your favor.

Once they hate you, it's an uphill battle.

The key is to soften your image BEFORE you ever get to trial.

BEFORE the defense sees you and hears you.

Once the defense thinks the jury will hate you, they will dig their heels in and gladly take their chances with a jury.

The odds of the defense winning go up dramatically if the they see you as being a bastard and an unruly jerk.

Your attorney has his work cut out for him.

He has to start softening you immediately.


Not later.

This is a slow process.

You have to learn why this is so important.

You have to make an effort to improve your image.

Not fake it.

You can't fake this.

It has to be real.

It has to be natural.

It has to be who you really are.

Before you were injured.

This has to be coaxed out of you.

Slowly but surely this will come.

It will happen.

You will improve your image.

But you must work at it.

You must improve it.

It will help you in the long run.

It should also help you psychologically.

What's the bottom line?

Don't give the jury a reason to hate you.

If you do, you'll be miserable when they return a verdict against you.

Stop hating yourself.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Look to improve.

Look at others who can motivate you.

Look at others who have overcome severe disabling injuries and gone on to live active lives.

War veterans.

Accident victims.

Sports athletes.

Follow them.

Follow their actions.

Become inspired.

Then start to smile.

Even if it's unnatural.

Then over time, you'll notice your outlook change.

You'll appreciate what you have, not what's been taken from you.

Then you can go into court feeling more confident.


Because you know the jury will never hate you.

They'll look up to you.

They'll see you as an inspiration for others.

That will get them to want to help you.

To learn how a little white lie at trial can ruin your case, I invite you to watch the quick video below...



Gerry Oginski
Connect with me
NY Medical Malpractice & Personal Injury Trial Lawyer